So you spend another Saturday at another wedding. You put off your own life to celebrate the love of your friends. Or at least someone you kind-of know.

You dress up, travel and sit through an overindulgent ceremony. You listen to the bride's cousin sing a flat rendition of a song from a movie. You tolerate a poorly planed attempt at a viral video. Finally, you get to wait around for the couple to finish their first fight and start the reception. Where you get to avoid bitter bridesmaids and drunks with wandering hands.

The evening is topped off with the Chicken Dance and trying to explain The Village People to your kids.

Village People
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You made it through another wedding... than you get this text from the bride:

“I’m not sure if it’s the first wedding you have been to, but for your next wedding … people give envelopes. I lost out on $200 covering you and your dates plate . … and got fluffy whip and sour patch kids in return. Just a heads-up for the future.”

Yea, nice. That is a real text that Kathy Mason got after she and her boyfriend went to a wedding in Hamilton, Ontario. The crime that they dared to commit you ask? The wedding gift they gave the couple was a food basket containing fancy salsas, oil, biscuits, marshmallow spread, and stuff like that. The card was singed, “Life is delicious — enjoy!”

That sent the bride into a rage worthy of reality TV. The fun then continued in an email exchange that was printed in the Hamilton Spectator:

  • Gift-givers: “… to ask for a receipt is unfathomable. In fact it was incredibly disrespectful. It was the rudest gesture I have encountered, or even heard of.”
  • Newlyweds: “Weddings are to make money for your future … not to pay for peoples meals. Do more research. People haven’t gave gifts since like 50 years ago! You ate steak, chicken, booze, and a beautiful venue.”
  • Gift-givers: “It’s obvious you have the etiquette of a twig, I couldn’t care less of what you think about the gift you received, “normal” people would welcome anything given, you wanna have a party, you pay for it, DON’T expect me to.”
  • Newlyweds: “You should have been cut from the list … I knew we were gunna get a bag of peanuts. I was right.”

So yea, they have to be some pleasant people. I'm sure we can look forward to seeing these newlyweds showing up in a shaky YouTube video yelling at a cashier for politely doing their job.


 

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