Homeless Oakland Raiders Could Turn to Howard Wood Field for One Season
The homeless Oakland Raiders could be looking for a place to play next season while its new stadium in Vegas is being built. How about eight games at Howard Wood Field?
Oakland is getting ready to potentially host its final Raiders game on Monday Night Football against the Denver Broncos. Everyone is aware of the team leaving for Las Vegas, but that new stadium won't be ready for another season yet. They could return to the bay area for the 2019 season, or they could look elsewhere.
So why not turn to a city that is a quick nonstop flight away from Vegas in Sioux Falls? The city has hosted numerous big-time events, and eight Raiders games would be equivalent to hosting an every weekend basketball tournament in this town.
When asked about the possibility of coming to Sioux Falls, Raiders head coach Jon Gruden expressed his love for the city.
"That town. Sioux Falls. What a beautiful city and what a great opportunity it would be to play a few games there. Haven't you seen those fans? Wow. Incredible! I haven't seen anything that beautiful since I traded away Amari Cooper."
The incredible response from Gruden prompted action from many in Sioux Falls including Sioux Falls School District's Activities Director Casey Meile and the staff at Howard Wood Field.
"We would be all in on having the Raiders turn into the Sioux Falls Raiders for one season," said Meile. "As long as Coach Gruden and the players respect the strict no sunflower seeds rule on the turf that my father instituted at Howard Wood Field, I think we can make a deal with them.
Two days later when asked about the potential partnership between the Raiders and Sioux Falls, Gruden tried to back away from all the rumors.
"You know...I made a mistake with Khalil Mack," Gruden admits, "I don't want to make a mistake with this one-year residency. I've consulted with my best friend at ESPN Jon "Stugotz" Weiner, and he was once offered to go to Sioux Falls on a private jet and never showed up. Now they just expect us to fly commercial up there? How do they expect me to coach without eating sunflower seeds? Worst case scenario, I guess, is that I can just leave my players in that black hole of a city instead of trading them to my competition."
His words ricocheted across the town with much of the city taking offense. Meile says he was on board with the plan until the town was called a black hole and the demands increased.
"Who is this guy to say that about this city and our great facility," said Meile, "We'd have to bribe our students with extra credit to attend the games that they put on the field. Our public schools put on a more entertaining product during the fall. The deal is over and they can stay homeless."
There is no word on if the Raiders have received another offer from another city.
This article is obviously satire in all nature. Do not believe anything that you just read. If you do think this was the case, you probably think that Alabama will come to Sioux Falls to play Augustana once the Vikings go DI..or something like that. This is purely for fun and nobody was interviewed for this satire piece.